i feel so frustrated. my liking you is such a heavy burden on my shoulders. i feel like im screaming your name at the top of my lungs and you can't hear me.
You want to be with me.
You. Want to be with me.
I gotta say, I like that idea. Things are tough for both of us right now so it's a little scary, I'll admit.
But I feel like as long as we have each other's backs, we'll make it.
This is crazy.
I encourage everyone who has a super friendly super nice crush to just tell them. It'll feel like ur heart has lost a few pounds.
I couldn't find my paperwork and got flustered and emotional like I do when I lose something.
When I finally found it, I smiled big at you and said, "you're welcome for bringing all of this into your life."
You looked at me and said, "it's been one of the best parts of my life."
And then you broke my heart.
I think you broke yours, too.
I wish I could save you.
I keep having to remind myself:
It's okay to be weird. It's okay to be your lame self, don't try to be something you're not. Because you have to know if he'll like you for you.
You're not mine, you haven't been for some time now.
And that's okay because I don't want you to be. I stopped wanting to be with you quite a while ago.
But that doesn't change how I once felt about you. It doesn't change how real it was and how much I loved you and how long I was in love with you.
You've been with someone else for a couple of years and tomorrow you two are getting up in front of all of your friends and family and promising to love each other and be together forever. I love you both and am so happy for the two of you.
Time and distance does not erase history but I'm ready to say goodbye.
I'm letting you go for the last time.
You with a wavering heart. You that take sometime to fall in love again like me. You, scared of getting intimate. You longing to become one.
I dedicate my hours before bedtime to pray for you.