I wracked my brain thinking of ways to describe what I feel when it's just you and me. I've told you before that it's like a seed of sunshine in my chest, like light. But it's not just that-- this beautiful little seed you've planted is starting to grow roots that might reach down to my feet, its leaves are unfurling in emerald green that shines through my eyes like sunbeams through the sea, and I swear the thing is starting to grow flowers too.

So take care of it, will ya? Pour affection over it so its roots never thirst, caress its leaves with gentle touches that encourage it into stretching toward the sky. 

I always compared us to magnets, unnaturally drawn together and almost inseparable. Now though, I see it as like birds. We choose to go migrate and come together, it’s not a supernatural force at all. It’s free will.

Hey God, I know You're omniscient and that Your timing is superior to mine and everything, but like, wyd? I'm just trying to fall headass in love with someone's boy child and live happily ever after, so if You could just send him my way, that'd be great.

I'm ready and willing to work to make a good thing last, but You gotta meet me halfway.

Thanks for looking out, G.

my friend is so stupid and brainwashed by white beauty standards that they wax poetic endlessly about people's eye colors. this green eyes like fairytales or 'multicolored' eyes like gravity bullshit. honestly fuck all that, white people eyes remind me that they see me as a commodity, as foreigner, as subhuman. I'm done with wanting fucking 'forest' eyes or 'ocean' eyes like when I was younger and didn't realize that beauty, value, and whiteness were not one and the same. 

give me dark eyes only so I know you're really looking at me. dark eyes that go so easily between soft and sharp it leaves me dizzy. dark eyes that half moon when you smile, so that the grin makes over you're whole face with joy. only brown eyes have the warmth I'm looking for, the heat that makes me feel wanted. that makes me feel home

Today, we talked for the first time after two years. Never felt such weight to be lifted from my chest. We gave each other a present that we failed to have before: forgiveness. It was nice meeting you again.

If you got out of bed this morning despite immense physical or emotional pain, I commend you. If you stayed in bed this morning because of immense physical or emotional pain, I understand you. If the world didn’t allow you to ask for the help you needed today, I‘m sorry that happened to you.

i feel awful. i don’t know if it’s my grades in math or the gone-bad fruit i had or the horrifyingly sad book on the vietnam war i finished last night or the fact that you’re so, so, so far away.

고생했어요

A Korean phrase introduced to me by a concerned friend, meaning "You've done well" and literally translated as "You have suffered."

This is the phrase that has embodied my overburdened soul, and how I have been feeling recently. Fighting to keep my head above water. Cracking because I can't handle the pressure. Being able to tell myself that I have suffered, and I have done well. I broke down and cried when I heard it.

No matter how awful your situation is, remember that it is already a huge accomplishment to get to where you are now. Remember to acknowledge it. You've been through so much. You've fought, you've endured, you've progressed.

You have suffered.

You've done well.


-Sayuri

I never saw anyone look so handsome while laughing.

I miss you so much it hurts physically.