i feel obligated to describe you so one could see you through my eyes. in order for them to know how you make comets soar in my mind at the mere thought of you, i have to write all the details down. i should have them add up all of these little tidbits together in order to see how lovely you are.

but where do i start?

it's as if crumpled stacks of paper are on the floor, unnumbered and undefinable. it's a new language which i can't decode.

it's okay though.

maybe all it takes is someone to notice and to be a bystander. if they keep a watchful gaze on me, it'll be clear to see the stars in my eyes when i look at you. it's painfully obvious that you send my heart flying to faraway planets just by being close to you.

I still can’t recall the first time we met

What I do remember is that I really liked you from the start, but just as a nerdy friend

And then suddenly all I could think about was the way your eyes were sparkling when you smiled

I wanted to kiss you so badly, I still want to kiss you

You’re on my mind constantly even though I haven’t touched you in months

You’re everything I didn’t know I was looking for and I just wish that we can have one more chance

I still can’t recall the first time we met

But now you’re the only one I want


You set something on fire in me. You bring out the best of me. You make me feel so alive.

You are so unapologetically you that I'm not scared to be me.

Today it was confirmed that you like me. And I like you.

Today we found out we like each other.

my boyfriend loves memes, he sends me memes all the time. But he has a specific one that he loves, the Kermit holding the phone meme. The one where he's hugging the phone. He thinks its the cutest thing ever and the other day he told me he was Kermit and that I was the phone. My heart literally cried.

I didn’t really begin to “blossom” until my mid-twenties, which may not sound as comforting as I believe it is but I wish I could tell that to my younger self. You don’t have to have it all figured out at any point in life but least of all when you’re 15. I don’t know how to explain it other than I began to see myself as me instead of the me I felt like I should be based on the way I thought other people perceived me. I know, it sounds ridiculous. I began to appreciate my body and all of the things it does for me, rather than living by the constant self-insulting soundtrack in my head. I learned how to be confident enough to stand up for myself. I opened up to my doctor about the anxiety and panic I’ve been in the ring with all my life and I’m getting help. I feel like I’m worth being loved.

i really really really liked you and i really wish i could go back in time and tell you that i felt like my heart was soaring whenever i noticed the way your eyes crinkle behind your glasses when you smile or all the dumb jokes you'd make to keep me laughing. i remember how happy your notes would make me and the way i'd read them over and over in bed, feeling my chest grow tight with giddiness. i liked you so much i couldn't fall asleep at night, which had never happened before. i think we could have been great and wonderful if only the timing and everything else worked out, but nevertheless, i am so happy i got to know you and get to see you in love now, even if it's with someone else.

-sixteen

i missed those times when you would secretly, and constantly, stare at me. because your stares are always full of genuine curiosity and something that i just can’t put into words. then, i would stare at you back. cue the flushed faces, hearts beating in the speed of light, and a million things going around our heads.

—the girl with the red kebaya

Plot twist: my crush has a crush on me😂😂💙

~S

After 4 years, why am I still thinking of you?