I hate the phrase "You'll find love when you stop looking". I'm sure we've all heard some version of that. It's false, and stupid, and contradictory. It should be, "You'll find love when you stop freaking out". 

I was freaking out about finding love for three years. It sucked, and practically drove me into therapy. Also, it was ridiculously ineffective and almost lost me some very close friends. Then, I decided to stop caring. If something happened, great. If not, I was just gonna be me. And in one week, I had been asked out by three separate guys.

I have a sneaking suspicion that we are more transparent than we think. If all we are thinking about is love, and where Mr. or Ms. Right is, it's going to show through. We get panicky, and messy, and uptight - and worst of all, we stop being ourselves because the world has told us we need to be different, sexy, mysterious, coy, sarcastic, what-have-you, if people are going to love us. Which is false.

So don't stop looking. That's stupid. Keep washing your hair. Wear something sexy. Put on makeup. Go to parties. But please stop freaking out.