Sometimes I try to convince myself I don't really like you. I pretend that you don't pop into my mind 1000 times every day. I pretend that the thought of you doesn't make my heart speed up and put a smile on my face. I pretend that I just think of you as a really good friend. I pretend that I don't want anything more.
But then.....but then I see you. Or you send me a text. Or I somehow convince myself that I should send you a text. And in that brief moment I cannot deny to myself that I feel myself slowly but surely longing to have you wrap your arms around me.
I can't say that I love you; I am still too young and naive I think to truly know what it means to be in love. What I do know however, is that you make the butterflies in my stomach awaken, you make me laugh and forget my stresses, you make me feel excited for the future, you make me feel good about myself.
At the moment, I am not brave enough to tell you how I feel. At times I think to myself that "today is the day", and I think that maybe, just maybe, I will be able to muster enough courage, but it never happens. Maybe one day I will find that bravery and courage, or maybe I never will, and next year when we are no longer together in the same place, I will be kicking myself for not being able to speak up. Who knows?
For now I just want to say thank you. Thank you for making me happy, for lifting my spirits when they were at all time lows, for sticking with me throughout all these years and being a wonderful and supportive friend. Maybe one day I'll know what it feels like to be in your embrace; or maybe you'll just be a happy memory in the storage of my mind. No matter what, know that you have brightened my days and changed me for the better.