I am trying to take care of myself. I am finally acknowledging the destructive way I see myself and I am trying to work on it.
I am trying to practice self love and self compassion. Trying to release the self hatred I have felt towards myself my whole life. I am doing it for me of course, but I am also doing it for you.
I know we haven't met yet, but someday you are going to come into my life and god dammit if I lose you because I am not ready to accept the idea I am worth being loved. I will try my hardest to be ready so that when you do come into my life I will be able to accept your love fully.
So just know that I'm trying. I have been trying since before we met because you deserve it. You will be worth it. I can feel it.