a friend

.

that’s what we are supposed to be, I think

.

and it is hard, when sometimes feelings change and it isn’t what you want

but it can’t change. I can’t let it

.

we’re friends. and it’s good. we laugh— a lot. and we have serious talks. and we ask each other every day how things have been. we talk about what’s important and good, and lately those every day texts are what helped to pull you out of a dark place.

you make me laugh. and sometimes make me mad. and when you’re not around, I notice

you’re doing so good for yourself. you’re better off than you’ve been in a long, long time

.

I’m comfortable, but I can’t let my guards down

I can’t tell you the whole whole story, even if I can tell you some pretty deep, dark thoughts and chapters... this far, I’ve mostly just listened, and I’m fine with that

.

I hope this doesn’t happen like it did the last couple of times. let’s not change. this is good. can it always be like this?

ramble