I don’t know the word for what you are. It’s greater than beautiful. It’s more like I’m drawn to you, I guess, like the moon is to the Earth is to the sun, like all the stars aligned and I’m hurtling towards you at a million miles a minute. There is a brightness all about you, an unnerving kindness, a gentleness, a lovingness emanating from every inch of your aura. It’s disarming in the best way. You’ve got this golden glow about you, this unfaltering confidence in who you are that makes everyone around you settle comfortably into who they are, too. I love that. I love that. I love you.

Your green eyes, your golden hair, the blush on your cheek every time my eyesight touches you, those small lips, your sexy accent and your curves...... is this what God’s handwriting looks like? 

The Chem Prince









at least i can say that i loved you as much i could. that i didn't give up on our problems, on trying to work things out, on loving you as much as i could. it was only until i realized that we had a problem that neither of us could fix.

i couldn't make you love me back. and it's something i learned the hard way.

i so desperately wanted for us to work out. perhaps it was that hope that my first love would be my last. i think i just thought you were just a really great person and to lose you would be terrible. i wanted to hold on to you, but you couldn't love me back. especially when you didn't love yourself. and i get it.

it's not something i can change or force on you. and even though i get it. it hurts so much. and it's probably just the withdrawals of not having you here anymore. it makes me feel like i'm dying at times - suffocating in your absence.

but i know... i'll get over it. and time will pass. and i will move on, get better, and things will be okay. eventually. and they'll be okay for you too. (: and i trust that one day, we'll both be okay. and as much as i deserve someone who loves me wholly, you do too. and i hope that at that point, maybe you'll be able to do the same.

i love you. and i miss you. but we weren't meant for each other.

My dad died in January. I just stumbled across a small video I filmed of him at the last birthday he ever had, in 2017. He didn’t like to be filmed/videoed, so it’s the last live film I have of him. The most important 19 seconds of my life. I keep playing it over and over.

sometimes, all i can think about is how lonely i am, having not found a relationship in years.

but when i spend a night out with friends, laughing until i'm in tears, i realize that no amount of relationships could ever replace them.

so this one's to the best friends out there, the people who will always be there for me. though i haven't found my soulmate yet, i'm so happy that i have found them.

What I love about this site:

1. It’s all about love, admiration, and feelings

2. 99% of you are caring, loving, human beings who just want to love and be loved

3. Most of you write such wonderful stuff because it comes straight from your hearts

4. By and large you care and root for people on this site- despite the fact that we are all strangers to one another

5. This is the only site I was ever on that routinely makes my heart ache with love- all because of the energy and power of your loving words

God Bless All Of You!

You are forever in my hearts! ❤

LTC 4 Life!!!

I came out to my mom about being trans. I love her so much. I really hope she understands.

- Magic Became Our Stars

So my friend told me that you aren’t pursuing me because you’re too intimidated because I am “out of your league?!?”


I’m not that good looking!!!

Please... I want to be in YOUR league!!!!

I want to tell you that I like you so bad. You're so unlike any of the other guys that I've had things with or crushes on. You're unbelievably smart, and so sweet, and a little bit awkward, and even though you're soft-spoken I know just how funny and sassy you can be once you come out of your shell, and all I want to do is learn everything about you. I've never been so infatuated with anyone like you; I know that you've never had a relationship and you're kinda shy and I probably have to make the first move. My best friend swears that you like me, but the more I start to like you the more vulnerable I become and the more unsure and nervous I am about opening up to you. But I love having conversations with you about literally anything, and I love seeing your smile and your eyes and your dumb messy hair. And everything you do is cute, even when it shouldn't be: cooking, baking, playing the bagpipes, juggling, chemistry, puzzles, making memes, running marathons. You're the only person that could convince me to leave the dorm at 3 am to go sledding with a group of dudes I've never met, because I know i'm safe with you. You're the only person I would stay up late before my 8 ams to finish watching stranger things with you, or harry potter movies, or the lord of the rings, or some stupid nerdy card game that I don't even get how to play. I've started going to church and bible study again partly because you're so devout and you've convinced me. You have no idea just how wonderful you are to me, absolutely no idea.

And I want to tell you everything. I want to get hot chocolate with you, and go sledding with you, and have snowball fights, and run marathons, and do chemistry studying, and have you teach me juggling and me teach you sign language, and all the little things that we already do, but I want to be more than what we are. You have no idea how close I was to just being honest a few nights ago, when it was just us watching bird videos at like 1 am in the study room. Every time I caught your eyes I stopped thinking about anything else but just spilling everything out. I like you so much, and I have for a while but I don't think I've known it until now. And you're so good, just so pure and kind and genuine, more than anyone I've ever come across. Even when you're anxious or frustrated or grumpy and sleep deprived, you still are so kind and warm-hearted. I'm scared that i'm not pure or honest or godly enough for you, and I'm so scared that you won't like me back, or that someone better will come along and get you, because you really deserve the best.

I want to hug you so bad, I just want to hold you and know that you're mine. I want to talk to you so badly, and I've almost worked up the courage to, I promise. I just don't know how. You're so important to me and if I screw this up I lose one of the greatest friends I've ever gotten to know, even though we just met about 5 months ago. I thought you were going to kiss me, that night when we were alone. I really wished you had. I wished I had kissed you. Or even hugged you, or held your hand. I gave you a pat on your shoulder because I had to touch you, I just had to, but I didn't know if you'd like me. I still don't know. I really hope you do.

And I hope that if you don't, that it's not weird and we can still be friends. I just don't want to lose you, and I would hate to not ever know if we could have been something more.

I need to stop being a baby. I promise I'll tell you soon.