I wait for your text like I wait for the rain

difference is, I can smell the rain before it falls

I always had a better sense of nature than I did people

I didn’t catch an aroma before your texts stopped

it was after when I found an old memory of you

Love.

Four letters. A feeling. Simple.

Yet, my person makes it complicated.

Or maybe I'm meant to be alone as long as I live

i wrote many letters to crushes in the past, but this one is for you, my love.

i love you and i'm so glad we found each other in this world. i want to spend all my days and nights with you for the rest of my life. i really can't wait to marry you someday. i love you in every universe.

I should know better. Only a crazy person would keep trying the same thing hoping to get a different result. The writing on the wall is in plain black and white. You're straight. You won't ever look at me the way I look at you.

Call me crazy, I'll keep digging myself deeper into this hole out of my obsession with you.

I want to tell you how much I appreciate you. Because I do. I don’t know if you get letters like this often, maybe you do, but you need to know how much I care for you. I want you to be happy and I’m sorry for all the pain you’ve received and maybe the pain that I’ve caused you. Thank you for being a friend. It’s alright if you don’t feel the same way about me, I get it. I just think you should know how I feel. Thank you.

People who obsessed over the same person for years. I've been there. And the thing I learned is that it's not about them, your happiness and your future does not depend on them, only depends on you. There's no such thing as the one, or at least not in the way the movies and books tell you. If you're longing for them for years and they don't see you like that, you're not the one for them, therefore they're not the one for you. The one is the person with whom you mutually choose to give all of yourself to the other. The one who sees you for who you are and chooses to love all of it. It's your choice, always. And if you're convinced that the person who doesn't love you back is the one for you, and you think you're destined to be waiting for them forever, it's not destiny, it's the choice you made. It's not some torture you must go through, it's not a noble cause, it's only your choice to be miserable, to be heartbroken, to never heal. You may think this is what you deserve, but you're wrong. You can always choose otherwise. Takes time, and effort, but you can do it, no matter how impossible it may seem this moment. It's the work to let others in that's the hardest, but when you do it you will be surprised how much love you can give to others. I'm not saying you'll forget about them completely, the ones we loved will always have a small hold on our hearts, but it will transform into a love that's not obsessive, a love that is pure and accepting and peaceful. With time you will become open for others, you can and will fall in love again when you let yourself. Please let yourself.

I’m so in love with you. It is sickening. I can’t get you off my mind, I can’t seem to find ways to get over you. I just want you. I want you so much.

I can't fathom the reason why my body still cripples when she shows up on the screen of my phone. Her gaze is the same, as well as her height. Her hair is freshly cut and it draws a sturdy straight line on her back, visible even though her body is moving. How can it be so perfect? I suddenly realize, I've never paid attention to her dancing. It just captivates me, I am enthralled by her movements, her footwork. How have I never noticed it before? Just like that, my heart is pacing while my mind is like not again. Anew, I am dropped into a trap I built myself. I am still holding onto something that used to exist. Something that, genuinely, never existed. Something that, maybe, could've existed. While my neurodivergent brain was trying to process my depression, I saw her as the only light. And to this day I can't let go of the idea I had (and unconsciously have) of her.

I was thinking of her during the solar eclipse today. I know she was watching it, too.

I felt like the universe was aligning just for us - me and her, a special moment where everything else faded away, and it was just her and me in the midst of something extraordinary.

Anyone with eyes, and ears, and a soul, can see, hear and feel that you are beautiful. Some things go without saying.

Or rather,

leave you speechless and breathless.