I'm not over you. It's been almost two months since I broke up with you. I hate how I feel these feelings are invalid because I was the one who did the dumping. I hope you know, it was worse emotional pain I had ever experienced. It was not easy by any means.
On lonely nights like these I miss our late night conversations too. I miss you and all your flaws. You miss the idea of me. You miss what I did for you. How do you get over someone who wasn't good for you, but who you loved very dearly?
You told me you lost someone who cared about you. Someone to confide in. Was I only that to you? Did you care about me at all? Do you even know who I am?
I loved you, but it killed me. And yet I'm still writing you letters, my dodo.
I can't tell you about all the moments you have impacted my life or how important you are to me. You don't deserve to know. You don't want to know.
abigail
i wrote a poem about you.
here it goes:
dear abby,
you make me feel crabby
but whenever im with you
nothing, fuck you
have a great summer xoxo
I'm so glad I got ghosted.
At first I was so heartbroken. I felt so awful and sick.
Then I started to remember the truth about this boy. I found my old diaries from 3 years ago and forced myself to read them.
Wow. I can't believe I put up with such a loser.
Being ghosted was a blessing.
It blows my mind how far we’ve come since I’ve moved back. Three weeks ago you didn’t even seem to want our freshmen to know you liked girls, let alone that we were dating, and today you held my hand in the middle of the diner we were at. I’m fast falling in love with you and I’m so glad you’re mine.
i told her today that i feel unloveable, and that i feel like i can’t be loved. to all of you reading this, spoiler alert: it didn’t end well. she said she loves me, but probably not in the way that i want to be loved.
i’m so tired of falling for the people who won’t catch me.
i miss you, or i miss the idea of you, or i miss the lazy idyllic summer days of playing cards with you in a city i knew surrounded by friends and feeling secure and happy and not so lost
What would've happened if I'd walked you to your car?
Or even just lingered there a few moments more?