I'm a musician, so I like to think of interpersonal relationships in terms of frequencies. Each person has their own unique frequency, and no matter how much that frequency can be masked by external factors, that frequency will never change because it is the very essence of who you are.

Dissonance is caused when frequencies clash. A pair of dissonant people, no matter how attracted they are to each other's superficial qualities, will always fall apart.

Consonance is caused when frequencies are similar and compatible. Consonant people can be great friends, and they definitely add to each other's lives. If they find each other attractive they might date, and have a pleasant relationship.

Resonance is by far the rarest of the three, and is caused when frequencies match. By its very nature, resonance can't add to a person, neither can it diminish- it can only amplify. Resonant people somehow feel more like themselves when they're together, and it can be both liberating and infuriating. When people are truly resonant, they have a bond that runs remarkably deep, because it is one of profound understanding. There will always be something that draws them together when they allow it to happen.

The resonant people in our lives are our soulmates. We won't necessarily marry them or date them, but they're the people with whom we can be who we truly are.

But dissonance, consonance, and resonance can all be obscured. Attraction, fear, mistrust, anger, or simply circumstance can throw people together or apart, and shove them in our out of a bond they're not meant to be in.

Losing a dissonant person is a godsend.

Losing a consonant person can be extremely sad- they added to your life and were a wonderful part of it. At the same time it can be a little relieving to not have to be something that you aren't.

Losing a resonant person is the essence of heartbreak. When you lose someone you resonate with, you've lost a bit of yourself that you didn't have before they were in your life. Sure, you're still you, but without that resonance, your own light doesn't give off the same power or glow. There's an aching, gnawing sensation that can only be caused by someone like that.

So, if you have someone in your life who's dissonant with you, get rid of them as soon as you can. If you have someone in your life who's consonant with you, cherish their friendship. And if you have someone in your life who's resonant with you, for fuck's sake don't ever let them go.

16 comments add comment

  • m
7 years ago

im a musician too, thank you for posting this. I've been struggling with my feelings for someone for a while now, someone who is resonant with me, someone who i never want to lose. thank you for this.

  • m.a.
7 years ago

I liked reading this.

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

Front page material.

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

Fucking beautiful. Whoa.

  • Georgina
7 years ago

Holy freaking crap... wow.

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

Wow I agree with everyone that this is beautiful since I love music and relate to this.

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

This is lovely and it should definitely make the front page :)

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

Freaking awesome. Love it!

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

Freaking awesome. Love it!

  • AP
7 years ago

From one musician to another, well said

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

I like to think my boyfriend and I resonate with each other. This is beautiful. Thank you.

  • :3
7 years ago

I play music myself, and this is an extremely beautiful perception.

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

I don't know if my boyfriend is one of these resonant people but I'm sure my best friend is.

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

I feel like my crush could say this

  • anonymous lover
7 years ago

Wow this is incredible. It actually completely puts into words feelings that i though i would never be able to describe. When i lost the one person who was ever truly resonate with me I felt like i died and it took a long time for me to be me again. This letter is so extremely beautiful. Thank you.

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